question of the week:

Where am i currently choosing comfort over truth?

My body’s response to this question is a full-on *cringe* - a contraction. I catch myself stop breathing, even if momentarily, it’s palpable enough to notice. Started with a doozy, Kel!

The moment I sit in quiet contemplation and get real with myself around this, I become aware that it’s layered - that what starts to ‘come in’ (to my awareness) quickly leads to other areas where this may be true as well, albeit in smaller ways.

And then I notice that what is required of me to be with all of that at once is overwhelming, and I want to abandon the question altogether.

And then I remember…that is exactly why I’m doing this. To stop abandoning myself; to face even just some tiny aspect of the places this question touches in me, and hold it with love.

Part of the overwhelm comes from not just my answer, but the ‘voices’ of contempt that follow, assessing, judging, criticizing it.

And then I remember…I can sift and sort through those voices to determine: whose voice is this? Mine? My Mom’s? Dad’s? Husband’s? Friends? Imaginary nay-sayers? God’s?

And I get quieter, still. I go deeper inside, I let my body be heard. When it’s not my voice - the voice of Truth in Me - my body contracts. When it is the voice of Truth in Me, my body relaxes…a *sigh* arises organically, without effort.

And now, I can be with the question, and the answer, with more clarity and compassion. I have settled the NOISE.

I have been choosing comfort over truth around food and caffeine for some time now. I have allowed my ‘busy-ness’ to be an excuse for not nourishing myself in a way that feels in alignment with my truth. My truth is that my body absolutely thrives when I consume simple, clean, nutrient-dense, mostly living, plant-based food and no caffeine. Through 30 years of experimentation, this is a hard truth in me, yet I let myself slip back into habits that do not serve this end. My sleep suffers, which leads to my exercise routine suffering, and an energy roller-coaster ride day after day.

I have recently re-committed to my truth in this area and everything has shifted. It required me to abstain from caffeine altogether, commit to consuming predominantly living foods (vs cooked and processed plant-based for comfort or convenience), more fresh juices and hyper-nourishing smoothies packed full of cruciferous veggies, more consistent exercise, and way more sleep! I haven’t felt this good in a very long time!

“Nothing tastes as good as feeling good feels.”

I’m not sure who said that originally, but I love it, it’s so true, and it keeps me focused on doing what I need to do for me to live my TRUTH and feel my BEST!

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